Growing Old Together

I can’t help but smile every time I see an old couple. I find it tender and heartwarming watching them interact whether they are loving and holding hands or she is yelling at her husband trying to get a point across that she’s right and he is an old deaf man. How you must love someone to spend your life with them and share so many intimate moments and putting up with each other’s craziness.

 

I believe that love is a growing entity and that in order to grow it needs constant attention, nurturing, and paying attention to the small things. Life can be so busy and crazy and stressful but what a joy it is to have someone you trust and love to share it with. Loving someone is about so many things: staying up thinking about them and how your date went, being super cute just to hear her giggle, doing something for her just so you can see her smile, watching her when she doesn’t know you’re there because she’s just so cute when she’s concentrating on her work, playing a love song at a random moment to keep romance alive, telling her she’s beautiful when you know she doesn’t feel that way but you see it even when she’s sick and wearing sweatpants. Love is seeing and knowing that things grow and change and together you have to adapt to it. It’s being willing to listen, to express, and to change if need be. It’s about knowing someone so well that it’s obvious you are close. It’s being like two teenagers who fell in love for the first time & loving that way as an old couple who has lived the last 45 years together. It’s the familiarity of her perfume every time you hug or kiss her; the transfer of emotion, energy and passion emotionally and physically. It’s about learning about them, developing yourself and creating togetherness.

 

How amazing would it be to know everything about someone down to even the small things? Like knowing when she bites her lip she is thinking something cute or sexual; that its impossible to not have a huge grin on her face for a picture; knowing that particular tone in her voice that says she’s scared when she says she’s not. Knowing that when she wears a particular piece of clothing or jewelry she’s in a good mood; knowing when she is concentrating she wrinkles her forehead; that when you’ve upset her, she becomes quiet for a moment then tells you to apologize and whether you think she’s wrong or right you apologize because you know you have somehow hurt her feelings and for that you really are sorry. Learning that when she has certain foods she gets tired or super energized or gets an upset stomach; knowing that when she pops your zits she needs to focus on something other than problems and stresses of life and just needs to relax (that its her way of taking care of you, not trying to hurt you). Realizing that if you don’t make a big deal of something that is a big deal to her she is going to be upset and then sad because it meant a lot to her and she wanted to share it with you; learning that particular amount of time you need to give her when she gets angry at you or a situation and walks away, how long to wait to go talk to her so she doesn’t feel pushed or smothered but also how long till she feels like you don’t care about her feelings because you didn’t go check on her; among a million other things that you can learn about them. How wonderful is it to truly know someone so deeply? How wonderful is it to love someone like that and to be loved like that in return? I think that is a pretty extraordinary accomplishment especially in today’s world but love is kind of amazing like that.